Swearblogger Roundup #2

Welcome to the slightly belated Swearblogger Roundup. It's a little thin on the ground this week, as I have not really had a chance to catch up on things myself, but a number of suggestions have come in.

They do tend, inevitably, to focus on issues surrounding the Labour Conference, so we may as well kick off with the Reactionary Snob's delightful diatribe against John Reid.

John Reid? What a complete and utter arse. He is a tabloid voodoo doll saying anything that will get him a few more column inches. In my humble opinion, he is a gibberingly illiberal bastard moving slowly but surely towards wearing shiny leather jackboots in public.
How long before he drops the 'Doctor' monikor and asks if he can be called Generallisimo?

Next up is the Nameless Tory, who is appalled at the fact that he finds himself vaguely on the side of The Demon Headmaster.

Now I fucking hate supporting Nu Labour and the shit awful, incompetent piss midgets that they call their leadership. I hate Jack Straw for his odd mix of stupidity, brown-nosing and general air of idiocy. But here he hasn't really done a great deal wrong.

given that I have not really had the time or the opportunity, it is delightful to see that The Lone Voice has laid into Polly with a vengeance: there is always space for that here!

Now for those not in the know Polly Toynbee is a 2nd, correction 10th rate socialist hack paid a fucking fortune by El Guardian to brown nose the socialist shit in favour of Blair and the other talentless spivs and shit mongers that make up this government.

And that's just the opener!

This is a little out of date, but I did find a post fisking Polly and her adherents at the new—and apparently short-lived—Quietly Seething, which was enjoyable.

I would hazard a guess that the majority of the commentators posting here who support Polly's argument, work in the public sector. They are acting out of self interest, and have absolutely no right to complain when the taxpayer does the same.

Pity that there seems to have been that one post and then... nothing. Now that really is very quiet seething.

Notes From A Small Bedroom points out that, just possibly, Clint Eastwood should not write his first name in capitals.

The Ministry Of Truth has a spendidly vicious post excoriating the paucity of talent on Thursday's Question Time.

Last night;s Question Time was one of those occasions where you really do end up feeling a bit sorry for David Dimbleby when you some of at the distinctly low-rent panellists he was landed with; Ian Hislop was moderately entertaining and Shirley Williams provided the kind of welcome gravitas one sees all too rarely these days and then usually only from politicians old enough to have been MP back in the days when we had real politics, but as for the rest…

He may be a card-carrying Labour boy, but you really can't fault Unity's writing: his merciless dissection of Squirrelface Blears is just an absolute treat.

The Vented Spleen gets nominated for his whole week's output but, since most of this is the fisking of Blair that I highlighted earlier, I'll just point out that I liked his pertinent comment on accidental masturbation.

No Swearblogger Roundup would be complete without a contribution from the poor, little Greek boy and so we give you his comment on "the Big Con".

Trawling through the relevant section of the Labour Party website for clues as to what this consultation might involve was a ghastly, soul-destroying half-hour of my life that I will not see again; time that would have been more fruitfully spent creosoting a fence, or lying on my sofa whacking off to Richard and Judy.

Emerald Bile's Noreen is, as usual, not fucking amused.

I fucking loathe amuse-bouches; those dabs of poncy, mucked about with food on a really large plate which the waiter brings, unbidden, before your starter arrives.

Mr Angry eulogises on something that pisses me right off as well: people who get in your wa when you are trying to walk somewhere.

Will you please get the fuck out of my way, because which ever side I try and overtake you on, you slide in that direction. Even loudly muttering, “Pick a lane, any lane!” doesn’t have the desired effect. It’s like a car chase in some bad 1970’s cop show. Each time I get close, you cut me off. You fucker.

Apparently, on London's Oxford Street, they have a "fast lane" and a "slow lane" on the pavement: sometimes I think that we should implement that everywhere. Especially in The Tube when I am trying to rush for my train!

The Longrider is unamused at Councils' efforts to spy on us through the medium of wheelie-bins. It sounds like something from a particularly silly farce, eh?

PigDogFucker agrees with Graham Norton. Much to my distress, so do I.

The Remittance Man feels moved to comment about the security problems that the Tories had in Bournemouth.

Yes, I know that there is some sort of need for security and I know that organising a big event is difficult. But for fuck's sakes; these guys are supposed to be convincing the nation that they have the ability to run a government. Couldn't someone at CCHQ have spoken to Plod and found out what exactly this whole process would entail?

Over at Regular Rantings, the Guttersnipe wonders just what, precisely, horses have got to do with anything?

Oh for feck’s sake horses. Why are they allowed to exist? In old medieval times they had a use, but following the dawn of the 20th Century we have developed the car, the tank, the truck. Why oh why does there seem to be a place for horses in modern society?

Like the blog tagline, incidentally.

Barry Beelzebub's weekly roundup is as good as ever.

I MAY have inadvertently given the impression in the past that I think the nation’s Underclass is thick. This is clearly not the case.

It takes a certain rat-like cunning to survive on the mean streets of Mr Blah’s NuBritain.

And, finally, saving the best till last, ChickenYoghurt's appraisal of SpamCam is, as per, beautifully written and absolutely spot on.

Cheers all, back next week!

Oh, and later on today, I shall be hosting the Eurosceptic Roundup: please feel free to send any suggestions to dk[AT]devilskitchendesign[DOT]com with Eurosceptic Roundup as the subject line.

Vale. For now.